Skip to content

Dance Gavin Dance is the greatest band to ever exist

    Its a circlejerk on Dance Gavin Dance (DGD) that started from r/corejerk subreddit.

    Dance Gavin Dance is the greatest band to ever exist. Give it 50 years, people are going to talk about The Beatles, Queen, Dance Gavin Dance, and Abba.
    
    Will Swans sweat has more rhythm then most posthardcore bands and Jon Mess is literally modern day Shakespeare. Literally. He is literally the greatest writer of all time reincarnated. Downtown Battle Mountain is equivalent to Romeo and Juliet and if you dont like it you don't understand what makes music good. Go listen to nikki minaj its equivalent to whatever isn't dance Gavin dance. 

    If Trump actually sells out Taiwan, us liberals should form a Taiwanese foreign legion that sails to Taiwan in their aid similar to the foreign volunteers in Ukraine

      A Taiwanese Redditor from r/neoliberal expects a ragtag group of volunteer Redditors to sail all the way to Taiwan to defend against a China invasion while also admitting he’s avoiding mandatory conscription. The person is also 100% serious and not shitposting.

      Hey everyone it's your resident Taiwanese here. Obviously nothing is for 100% certain but people on here are really doomy about the prospect of America actually backing Taiwan in a way that will effectively deter China. Even if China isn't deterred and tries to take Taiwan by force, Taiwan can still put up a fight but its unclear if he'll back us even then. The arms sale is still paused and there's no sign of this changing any time soon. Giving Taiwan weapons (basically a Ukraine situation) is the very, very bare minimum. Realistically we're going to need actual help from the West in terms of kinetic attacks by allied forces. The question is; how do we get it?
      
      I was looking at the Ukraine War and the presence of foreign volunteers on Ukraine's side. Hard to know an exact number but there is an "International Legion" which has about 2,000 uniformed troops in it. There's at least 10x more volunteers but they aren't officially in uniform.
      
      I am also taking inspiration from the Hasan Piker's recent "aid expidition" into Cuba. Please hear me out. To be clear I don't support the Cuban government or Hasan Piker but its tactics we can learn from. And I understand that in Ukraine those volunteers aren't the main fighting force in Ukraine - it's 99% Ukranian blood that has been able to stem the Russian tide so far. But the point is that when Ukraine called for aid, people answered.
      
      I am proposing that we do this in Taiwan. To be clear we're going to need all the help we can get in terms of ground forces and I and my Taiwanese countrymen would welcome those who would fight along side us on land. But what we really need is naval reinforcements.
      
      If China tries to take us by force the two major options is a naval blockade or some large scale kinetic attack. In the blockade scenario, they will essentially try starving us out by cutting off our oil shipments. Leftists frame the recent Cuba thing as a blockade but it's not really a blockade - it's an embargo. Ships can travel to Cuba unmolested, but any ship that docks at Cuba can't dock in America. This would be an actual blockade where they would intercept ships and turn them away, possibly even firing on them.
      
      In the kinetic attack scenario where they will launch a huge combined naval and air attack followed by a large scale ground invasion. They will have to do this in Mid april/September since weather conditions give them a relatively small window throughout the year where they could actually transport a bunch of troops by way of boat in an amphibious assault.
      
      The commonality here is that a naval presence is key to both of these scenarios. What I am proposing is this: Believers in liberal democracy throughout the world create a rag-tag navy that comes to Taiwan's aid. A militarized cajun navy if you will. Get a bunch of speed boats, fishing trawlers, jet skis, and other civilian boatcraft and outfit them with drones, machine guns, anti-drone guns, ect. If we generate enough interest in this we can also get funding for more serious hardware - the surplus naval market is a real thing. You can buy diesel submarines, frigates, ect. This will cost billions of dollars of course but if we get this idea going I think we can raise the cash - the tech gurus dont exactly want to see the world's semichip factory fall into communist hands and will support us. There are some legal issues related to the transfer of all this military hardware but the main problem is timing. We're going to have to act fast. I don't think we'll be able to really motivate people to this idea until China actually starts creating a staging area. The actual shock and awe campaign before they launch their ground forces would take months and the staging area process would also take around two months. Being conservative here we have about a 4 month window to rally people, solicit donations, acquire the necessary hardware, outfit the vessels, and train everyone.
      
      Obviously this is a rag-tag operation. We may be able to get covert support from China's adversaries for this op in terms of training but it's mostly gonna be on us. Naval veterans will serve as the cadre and train everyone ASAP. In addition to commanding the operation it's probably best if those with actual experience man the actual hardware (submarines, frigates, ect.) if we get any.
      
      I know what you're thinking. "How can this rag tag naval legion possibly stand a chance against the PLAN (people's liberation army navy) which is the largest in the world?" We don't, that's not the point. If Western democracies don't step in, Taiwan is likely fucked. We're stuck in a negative feedback loop right now - Taiwanese morale is incredibly low because many think the West won't help us so many will not fight. This makes Western policy makers are reluctant to come to Taiwan's aid which in turn further demoralizes the Taiwanese and so on. This changes that calculus.
      
      It's gonna be a bad look for Trump or whoever's President if 30,000 Americans sail into battle and get slaughtered with no support or protection. It's one thing to leave the foreign Taiwanese out high and dry, but their own citizens? It's going to encourage them to act. The idea is to draw democratic countries into the war. Force them to act. Any politician who presides over this and does nothing will have their political careers ruined.
      
      If they do a blockade, we initially do the "Hasan" strategy. Send a bunch of unmilitarized vessels carrying oil and other essential supplies to Taiwan. We spread out so they can't intercept all of you guys. If they intercept you"non-violently" (ie without spilling blood/firing upon us) no big deal, turn around and try to run the gauntlet again. We keep doing this for as long as possible getting the supplies you need to us and try to wait out the siege.
      
      If they fire on us, or they launch a kinetic attack in Taiwan, run skirmishes on them. Attack and disengage. The largest naval insurgency the world has ever seen. If that isn't enough to draw the West in, we attack them head on. We'll station about 10 percent of our forces in South Korea and Japan to the North. Another 20 percent in Philippines to the south. The bulk of our forces will use Micronesia or one those tiny pacific island nations past the third island chain, well out of China's missile range as a staging area. Sail off from there and launch head straight for Taiwan, the rest of forces will join us from the North and South, attacking them from all angles. We'll have cameras livestreaming this to the American/Western public. When China counter-attacks, it will be brutal. But that brutality will be caught on camera. People in cigarette boats dodging drones and missiles while launching drones of their own looking into the camera - "HELP US! HELP US NOW! IT'S NOW OR NEVER!"
      
      I'm not going to lie to you, this is a dangerous operation. But liberalism itself is at stake. If China gets Taiwan, the liberal world will no longer be the strongest super power. That will be China. Social media and misinformation campaigns have poisoned the wells of democracy. We may have to live with authoritarian hegemony for centuries until the world finally wakes up and realizes liberal democracy is the only way to ensure good, sound, sustainable governance. Democracy is never dead, but I'd rather not have to raise my kids and grandkids in CCP controlled Taiwan and I don't think you guys want to live in a world where you're a second rate power to China.
      
      The truth is, I am also one of those demoralized Taiwanese I spoke of earlier. I'm finishing up my education in Berkeley at the end of this summer and have to make a choice: work abroad or return home to Taiwan to do my conscription. You know how many obnoxious, condescending leftists of the tank variety that I have to deal with? They make fun of me for placing even an ounce of hope in democracies, that you guys will come to our aid. According to them I'm better off with China. I say fuck that. But if we aren't going to get supported, I'm not going to throw my life away needlessly. I'm just as cynical about getting support from the governments of the free world as you are but if we can't muster up some kind of volunteer response then it truly is over.
      
      I know this is just a stupid subreddit but it's been so important to me for my political development and I know a lot of important intellectual type people browse here. You guys have connections, and not just on this subreddit but all across the globe. So I ask you - will you ride out with me? For Taiwan? For Democracy? The world is yours if you are willing to take it. And you know what? Just when all hope was lost, when they thought they were going to lose, Gandalf came in and repelled the invaders. 

      Sometimes i fantasize about Zhuang Fangyi coming to Dijiang drunk and beating me

        Its the Misato copypasta but changed to Zhuang Fangyi from Arknights Endfield.

        Sometimes i fantasize about Zhuang Fangyi coming to Dijiang drunk and beating me until I feel numb. She trash talks me and kicks me in the ribs while smiling. Then she starts to cry and apologizes, begging me to forgive her. I gently hold her all night and she cries into my swollen belly. We will name our future child Chubby Lung. 

        I saw Elon Musk at a CVS at like 11:36pm on a Tuesday.

          I saw Elon Musk at a CVS at like 11:36pm on a Tuesday. He was in the greeting card aisle for a very long time. Not reading the cards, just standing near them with his arms crossed like he was supervising. At one point he picked one up, read it, and put it back facing the wrong way. He did this to seventeen cards. A CVS employee asked if he needed help and he said "I'm good" in a way that ended the conversation permanently.
          
          He got in line behind me with nothing in his hands. Just got in line. When he got to the register the cashier asked if he found everything okay and he said "that's a great question" and then didn't answer it. He tapped his card before she'd even told him the total. It worked.
          
          As I was leaving, I saw him hold the door open for "me" even though I was way behind him. But let go as soon as I got close 

          Prr mano, td lugar q eu entro nessa merda eu vejo essa pelúcia fdp.

            Prr mano, td lugar q eu entro nessa merda eu vejo essa pelúcia fdp. É só dar scroll no feed, abrir qq sub aleatório e lá tá ela: óculos redondos, franjinha torta, nariz vermelho brilhando, boquinha aberta mostrando dentinho de leite e aquele olhar de vadia pedindo pra levar rola kkk. Meu pau sobe na hora véi, a prr dura pra caralho pulsando dentro da cueca, pulsando mt forte. Já fiquei mt tempo dando zoom na carinha dela, apertando a foto na coxinha macia e imaginando cm seria meter nessa safada até gozar tudo nela. Me dá uma raiva da porra pq n dá pra fazer nada além de babar na tela e invejar p caralho quando a pessoa posta essa desgraça. Queria mandar na dm pedindo link pq eu preciso dessa puta mano. Alguém pfvr me manda o link da Shopee/Ali antes q eu pirar de vez kkkkk 

            English version

            Damn dude, everywhere I go on this shit I see this fucking plushie. Just scroll through the feed, open any random subreddit and there she is: round glasses, crooked bangs, shiny red nose, open mouth showing her baby teeth and that slutty look begging for a cock lol. My dick gets hard instantly, man, my fucking hard-on throbbing inside my underwear, throbbing really hard. I've spent ages zooming in on her face, squeezing the picture of her soft thighs and imagining what it would be like to fuck this slut until I cum all over her. It makes me so fucking angry because there's nothing I can do but drool on the screen and be incredibly jealous when someone posts this thing. I wanted to DM her asking for the link because I need this bitch, man. Someone please send me the Shopee/Ali link before I completely lose it lol

            I’ll never forget the first (and only) time my dad said he was proud of me.

              By u/thr33beggars, its satirical story of a child making his racist dad proud using the ‘Despite making up only 13% of the population‘ copypasta.

              I’ll never forget the first (and only) time my dad said he was proud of me.
              
              I remember it like it was yesterday. I was five and he had taken me to run errands on his day off work. We were at the bank so he could do some adult stuff, not sure what exactly and it’s not really important. What’s important is that I was holding his hand when a black man walked in and got in line behind us.
              
              I hadn’t really seen that many black people up close so I couldn’t help but stare. He glared at me, and then asked my dad if I had a staring problem. Even though I was five, I remember saying, “Hey mister, why do people who look like you only make up 13% of the population but commit 52% of the crime? They talked about it on Sesame Street but they never said why?” The man started flipping out and the bank manager asked us to leave. Right outside the bank door, my dad got down on one knee and said, “Son, I could spend all my life teaching you to be racist but it seems like you are already advanced for your age. I’m proud of you.”
              
              My dad was later sent to prison for a variety of hate crimes but I still carry that memory fondly.